Same Old Grind Secret to Satisfying Sex :

A diet with weekends off? Check out our new 5-day "Weekends Off" DeliciouslyYours meal delivery plan! Plus, sign up and get a FREE eDiets membership! Click for details.

I was thinking about sex recently -- as one does -- not really my own sex, but sex in general. And I was thinking that I understand why it gets boring in long-term relationships.

It’s not that your partner gets boring, or the sex itself gets boring. I think it’s because the way you VIEW the sex in your relationship gets boring. And that has everything to do with how you were taught to view sex from the very beginning.

From childhood, most of us are taught that anything to do with sex is “naughty.” It’s exciting and titillating. It’s hot. It’s forbidden. When we see or hear anything sexy, we giggle or make a face. In our society, sex is hidden behind a curtain, in the dark or in plain brown wrapping. It’s fun and appealing precisely because we’re NOT supposed to be doing it!Every first experience you’ve had with sex -- first kiss, first shag, first time with this or that person, first time in an elevator, first time on a plane, first time in the kosher meat section of the supermarket (ok, maybe not that time, but all the other times…) it was exciting, right? It was exciting because you really weren’t supposed to be doing it.

On the other hand, sex on the third Tuesday of the fifth month of the sixth year with your spouse is BORING. Because you’re thinking, I’m SUPPOSED to be doing this. It’s no fun if I’m SUPPOSED to be doing it. There’s no risk. No frisson of excitement.

But why should there be? Why should sex have to be a thrill ride to make it appealing?

I love the feel of a hot shower. I have always loved it. I cannot think of a time (except when I’ve been ruby red with sunburn) that I have not loved a hot shower. It is a great pleasure to me. It is an essential part of my life. It feels good, and it’s never boring. It’s a nice hot shower. That’s all I want it to be. That’s all it has to be. It’s a pleasure.

But not sex. It’s not a pleasure! It’s a little bit scary, and secret and “nasty.” And it’s no wonder people are disappointed night after night. Their outlook is all wrong!

Let’s demystify sex! Take it off the lace, leather and rubber pedestal. Downgrade it to just another one of life’s pleasures, right up there with angora sweaters, and new car smell.

A good old squelchy shag. A warm tumble with another naked body. Even if you don’t have multiple screaming mutual orgasms, it should at a minimum still be rather nice. And never boring.

Continue reading �