Relationships: When To Say When :

When is it time to let go of a relationship? Many times we hang on despite the fact that they are not supportive, caring or advantageous to personal growth and development.

Why do we hang on to these people for dear life, even though in our hearts we know it is time to let go and move forward? What hold do these people have on our lives that we hang on to the slightest shred of encouragement or loving words that we so desperately want to hear?

We are ready to give many reasonable excuses for why we choose to stay in negative and self-defeating relationships. The list is endless: children, financial obligations, fear of being alone, embarrassment and shame of once again not meeting the expectations of others and society.Then, of course, there are those magic words, “maybe they will change if I love them just a little bit more.”

The hitch is that it's human nature to hold on to the people in your life. Letting go is so painful, stressful and confusing that one does not want feel the familiar pain of yet another unsuccessful personal experience.

Unfortunately, it is difficult at the time to imagine that letting go may possibly be the best thing that you have ever done for yourself and your family. We become so entrenched in the relationship that letting go does not seem a possibility, despite all the red flags and blaring horns that you see and hear throughout the relationship.

We are not speaking about relationships that have love and friendships with problems. We are speaking about solo relationships, in which you have been giving 150 percent in every area -- not to mention ALL the emotional work -- with minimal if any participation from your partner. We are speaking about feelings of loneliness, emptiness, fear and the feeling that you are drowning or suffocating within the framework of the relationship.

The questions you need to ask yourself are: